Everyone's got to start somewhere, and Bad Buildings has to give mad props to Daniel Libeskind, the putz who proposes this nasty bit of business be welded on to the Hummingbird Centre at Yonge and Front. Congrats, DL -- you've given us exactly the stinker we needed, released in the Toronto Star today, to start this bitch with a bang.
(Oh, and fuck you, Martin Knelman, for calling this piece of shit (gak) "razzle dazzle," when REAL architecture critics, like your own estimable Chris Hume spoke the truth and called it trash.)
But Danny's incompetence could be a double-edged sword for your humble critic. I mean, that thing is so idiotic, such a moronic, insensitive application of form and material, such an over-the-top example of willful ignorance regarding the context of the urban fabric, not to mention a complete disregard for scale, there's not a hell of a lot we can say that his totally ass, ah, "design" doesn't already say for itself. I mean, come, DL -- what inspired you, a cat in heat, stiffening her tail in anticipation of getting the old high hard one? Surely you can do better than that.
Then again, remember that nasty bit of subterfuge about the ROM's "Crystal"? It was supposed to be glass, DL, remember? Oh, wait, you didn't know the structure couldn't support the weight of glass cladding, and neither did any of your engineers until you started. Riiiiiiight.
We damn well should have known better, I guess. But never let it be said that a Toronto developer let a marketing opportunity be squashed by good architecture. No sir, that would be a violation of the Toronto developer code -- a secret document tattooed, no doubt , on Concord Cityplace CEO Terry Hui's ass.
Back to the (ha) crystal. It should have been a good enough warning of what to expect from artiste-for-hire inc. I've never seen a self-described visionary so quick to compromise his vision when there's a buck to be lost. So what do we get? A jagged aluminum shed. Cultural renaissance, my ass. Try cultural regression. Thanks, buddy. Thanks a ton.
But don't worry, DL. In condo-crazy Toronto, extreme badness is accepted. Encouraged, even. Want to fuck up a tidy little exercise in picture-perfect late modernism, like the Hummingbird? The door's open! Welcome home, pal. As the new standard-bearer of brutal buildings, you'll be welcomed as the conquering hero. Bruce Kuwabara can be heard breathing a sigh of relief from blocks away ...
1 comment:
Even Libeskind's own family dod not want to live in his dum-ass designs. They hired Alexander Gorlin (google it - you'll see), to design the chez Libeskind in New York, practically across the street from the idiot's own office!!! As if any more proof were needed that Libeskind is the biggest jackass that ever sucked air!
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